Brother's Keeper

I deeply desire to be the man God wants me to be. From time to time, I hear someone accuse the Church or individuals within the church to be less than genuine. If I had a choice of what my legacy might be, I'd wish for people to say, "He was genuine, sincere, or real."

I pray often for accountability. I truly believe God places within our lives someone to walk with us hand-in-hand. Our spouse can be that person within certain areas in our lives. However, I need a man or men to know me more than just a casual acquantaince. Men understand how other men are "wired". Men can say things that women don't always understand. I'm sure it's the same for our sisters as well. Leonard Sweet mentions this type of friendship as few and far between. In fact, many times these relationships can be counted on one hand.

Recently, I was invited to a small group for men. I went for the first time this morning. Different churches are represented. Diversity is obvious. And the only motivation for those in the group is to help one another grow closer to Christ. It's what I think a picture of the Church looks like. I'm not sure my time with these guys will grow into the relationship Sweet describes. I pray that the group or within the group there's an answer to prayer.

In Genesis 4:9, Cain inquires of God, "Am I my brother's keeper?" Read in context, it seems to me that he is. Cain is. And I am as well.

What do you have to add/subtract in regards to accountability?

A Welcome Intruder

Leonard Sweet begins his "community/relationship" discussion by stating, "Life is a handicap event. We can't get to our destination without the help of others" (19). The premise of the book is based upon those two sentences. Sweet then takes 11 Biblical characters (the 12th being the Holy Spirit) and gives examples of why each of those character traits should be incorporated into our own lives.

The first Biblical example is that of Nathan. Many times we talk about the importance of accountability relationships(see previous posts). Sweet likes to think of Nathan as being an editor rather than an accountability partner. In other words, while one is looking for the wrong in another's life and correcting the wrong (accountability), the other is taking the good in another's life and editing it to be even better (editor).

You remember Nathan. Nathan had a special relationship with King David. He was allowed to say things that others wouldn't have been allowed to think. Nathan was a welcome intruder. "It's an editor's job to get you to ask the question: Is God's name glorified or smeared in my life?" (Sweet 39). The Nathan in your life must ask difficult questions for your own good. The Nathan in your life has the right motive (to help you be all you can be). Again, the difference between accountability and editing is motive. "Christianity quickly becomes Niceianity, and a Nathan doesn't live on Planet Nice, at least when we're around" (41).

Your Nathan may be a donkey (Balam), a fish (Jonah), or your spouse. Your Nathan cares about you. They've got your best interests at heart because you're loved. A Nathan has permission to proclaim "You are the man!" The problem is most of us are island Christians. Most of us are arrogant enough to think we can make it alone. Most of us refuse Nathan's in our lives.

How about you? Who's your Nathan? Who has permission to intrude in your life to edit the good? Who do you allow to tell you like it is? Have you found a Nathan?

Created for Relationship

We all know independent people. Shae is one of those people. When it comes to changing the oil in the truck, she can do it. When something needs to be done, give her enough time and its accomplished. You've been warned not to challenge her with, "That can't be done!" She will prove you wrong. She will either do it or find someone who will. I have to admit, when I try to do some of those things, I screw it up worse than it was. Eventually, it's time to find someone else to fix the problem.

For the most part, independence is a good thing. But more importantly, we need those we can count on to encourage us to live to our highest potential. We get to the point where we can't accomplish tasks on our own. Even the most independent people eventually need other resources. I need you and you need me.

Fact is: Mankind was created for community. Consider the examples of the Trinity, Adam and Eve, God and the Israelites, Jesus and the Church, marriage, the nuclear family, and _____________(add your own example here).

Americana has led us to believe "To accept, or worse yet, to request help signifies a weakness." How wrong we are when we buy into this idea. Christian pollster George Barna found 1 out of 6 believers has no accountability relationship with another believer.

It's just another way we've allowed society to infiltrate the Church.

More "Fodder"

Here's something to chew on:

I was recently asked by a close friend, "What's holding you back?" It was, of course, in the context of becoming more like Christ? After thinking about it for a few days and being brutally honest with myself and God, I'll leave it with you.

What's holding you back?

Accountability

This is an area of life where we aren't comfortable. Check out the "Secrets" post at www.KnowtheBlessing.com

Accountability is returning to the way things are supposed to be - transparency, honesty, integrity. That's why it makes fallen man uncomfortable. We really are used to hiding parts of our lives from others.

I ran across the following accountability questions. Are you willing to be this honest?

1. Have you spent time in God's word and in prayer at least 5 times this week?
2. Have you shown your spouse the affection that God asks since last time we met?
3. Have you spent quality time with your children?
4. Have you lost your temper since the last time we met?
5. Have you found yourself lusting after anyone since we last met?
6. Have you looked at porn?
7. Have you honored God with your finances (what you've kept, what you've spent)?
8. Have you eaten healthy? exercised?
9. Have you misrepresented any of your answers?
10. What areas do you need prayer?

Again, are you willing to be this honest? Am I?

John the Baptist said, "He must increase, but I must decrease."

Becoming Like Jesus

I was asked last week, "Why should I confess my sins to someone else? I've already confessed to God. That's all that matters." We discussed the practicality of James when he writes of the "Prayer of Faith" in chapter 5.

"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." (James 5:13-16)

James is writing of two different kinds of "sick" - one of physical ailments, the other, being spiritual. It was common among Jews in the ANE to believe all sickness was caused by sin. For this reason, James encourages readers to "come clean" and confess everything that is hindering spiritual growth.

Many Christians like to talk about accountability but the practice of confessing sins is much less popular. Case in point: the conversation last week was between myself and a person who has believed for decades. "I've confessed to God. That's all I need to do."

What's our issues with true accountability? More on this later...